Issue Section: Slightly Off Center

Slightly Off Center

Revelations. —by Dennis Hinkamp Given my heightened state of cynicism, some people find it hard to image that I actually was a student of the Bible (12 years Catholic school and 10 …

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Slightly Off Center

The little dog that saved the day. —by Dennis Hinkamp Some days are doomed. Road construction has slowed traffic to dial-up modem speeds, young people are surly because they are ba …

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Slightly Off Center

Why not? —by Dennis Hinkamp Why would anyone build a giant shark that you can drive around with 50 people in it? Why build a typewriter the size of a house or a temple that takes t …

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Slightly off center: The Age of Whatever

Applauding parents, however they came to be The software is not yet coded to diagram the meandering and defoliated branches of my family tree. When I go into the church genealogy l …

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Slightly Off Center

The Age of Whatever: Applauding parents, however they came to be. —by Dennis Hinkamp The software is not yet coded to diagram the meandering and defoliated branches of my family tr …

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Slightly Off Center

Utah trip advisor. —by Dennis Hinkamp Dang you, Internet! I write a couple motel reviews for Trip Advisor and I am forever hounded with follow-ups and requests for more. So here is …

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Slightly Off Center

How to be less of a jerk. —by Dennis Hinkamp People often ask me where I get the ideas for columns. My stock answer is: “It’s easy—everything irritates me.” I take one thing and tr …

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Slightly Off Center

Dronie of Your Ownie. —by Dennis Hinkamp Have you always wanted to fly, and to be an innovator, a criminal and strict constitutionalist all at the same time? It’s easy; just fly a …

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Slightly Off Center

How long? –by Dennis Hinkamp Water heaters can be faithful employees of your home for 40 years, but I doubt you really appreciate this mundane effort. You replace them, you move o …

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Slightly Off Center

Contrary to unpopular beliefs. —by Dennis Hinkamp The unexamined life is not only worth living, it is better; so just gag on your hemlock, Socrates. And, actually there are two con …

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Slightly Off Center

Viper pit of humor. —by Dennis Hinkamp Although humor is said to be healing and a photo finish second to money as the most desired component of a lasting relationship, it’s hard to …

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Slightly Off Center

Miracle for a cynic. —by Dennis Hinkamp I don’t believe in miracles, karma, ghosts or half of what I read in the news. I am skeptical about skeptics. How­ever, I am not cynical eno …

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Slightly Off Center

The five kinds of non-Mormons.—by Dennis Hinkamp As I approach my 35th calendar year in UTopia I have taken to referring to myself as a Common Law Mormon. It’s an easy laugh but it …

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Slightly Off Center

Totally credible news.—by Dennis Hinkamp I love the news and, in fact, am a journalism graduate from a semi-famous university. I just find that most of it lacks imagination. So, he …

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Slightly Off Center

Funny you asked.—by Dennis Hinkamp This has never been explicitly designated a humor column; I just use that description to give myself license to lie, make stuff up and generally …

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