Ask the Astrologer: A good partner, but are kids a dealbreaker?

By Christopher Renstrom

I am a Capricorn female (12/31/61 2:35 pm, Sussex, NJ) and my boyfriend is Libra (10/19/79, 9:30 am, Dover, NJ). What does the future hold for us? We both agree this is a “long term commitment” but the only issue is he wants kids and I am not having any more.

It looks like you found yourself a solid partner. I like the fact that you are both born under cardinal signs. Cardinal signs are the zodiac signs connected to the equinoxes and solstices. Your sign, Capricorn, is the zodiac sign of the winter solstice whereas his sign, Libra, is the zodiac sign of the autumnal equinox. Cardinal signs are directional signs which means that you both take your commitments seriously.

Astrologers look for three different things in a relationship— same sign pairings, ruling planet pairings, or Sun and Moon pairings. You and your boyfriend share a Sun and Moon pairing. He was born with his Sun at 25 degrees Libra and you were born with your Moon at 28 degrees Libra. This is an almost exact conjunction (a conjunction is when two planets are at the same point in the sky or horoscope) and it’s extremely powerful. In Traditional Astrology the Sun and Moon conjunction between horoscopes often indicates marriage.

There is a very strong future to your relationship given that Saturn will be moving through Libra for the next two years. Saturn is your Ruling Planet and Libra is his zodiac sign. However the issue of kids is a serious one and it’s a subject that you will be returning to over and over again. This is reflected by the Moon and Saturn square in your own horoscope. Saturn represents you (it’s your Ruling Planet) and the Moon represents motherhood, family, and roots. When two planets square each other in Astrology, they set up a conflict. You can think of it as arm-wrestling. Each planet is going to fight vigorously for what it wants. In your case your sense of autonomy and achievement (Saturn) is in conflict with motherhood and family (the Moon). You may have felt like you have had to make tremendous sacrifices vis-à-vis family concerns and that’s something you don’t want to revisit. This square conflict also appears in you and your friend’s horoscopes as a Saturn and Sun square. In this instance your friend may see you (Saturn) as blocking his ability to shine (the Sun) through children. It’s not a deal breaker, but it will be an ongoing hot-button issue. Your boyfriend will have to choose between you and having children and that won’t be an easy decision for him to make. In fact he will go through some heavy questioning periods around March 4, 2011, June 3, 2011, August 5, 2011, and November 2011. You two may never be on the same page about this, but you will always be in the same book. What this means is that you can find a way to agree to disagree if you look hard enough. Thankfully Libra is the zodiac sign of compromise. Finding a way to compromise—so that neither person feels burned or guilty—is the secret to a successful and long-lasting relationship.

This article was originally published on November 22, 2010.